nineteenpercent

May 27

I have no guesses about how old this man actually is.  His beard says 62, but everything else says 28. 

I have no guesses about how old this man actually is. 

His beard says 62, but everything else says 28. 

(Source: sienteelsonido, via its-better-with-a-beard)

[video]

May 26

I let out an audible gasp for the fate of that kid. 

I let out an audible gasp for the fate of that kid. 

(Source: my-little-phoenix, via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

May 25

(Source: bobrossgifs, via fuckyeah1990s)

JASON.

I  recently developed a hearty appreciation for JASON Momoa. 

A friend of 11 years, JASON, just recently contacted me out of the blue. 

I found out JASON Isaascs is the name of the actor in my new favorite show, Awake. (Which has just been cancelled after it’s first season.). 

I just met my neighbor, JASON, whose wife, Terra, I thought was pounding on my door like the swat team and screaming like a lunatic. (Turns out, it wasn’t her. Ooops.)

I just met a really cool guy whose name is JASON. 

[video]

“Everything IS actually a conspiracy, it has nothing to do with paranoia; it’s all facts. And all the important people have told us: Kennedy, Martin Luther King, Tupac. For real, they were all talking about the same shit. That’s why they all got assassinated.” -[a certain someone]

Apparently, in the song Umbrella by Rihanna, the repetition of the phrase “-ella, -ella, -ella, eh” means: “There is no god, there is no god, there is no god”.

(I have given up on trying to rationally dispute all of the ridiculously paranoid assertions that [a certain someone] presents to me daily. Instead, I have decided to give these gems to you. This is the first of many. Please enjoy).

angryandyellow: barackobama: You, Bill, Barack, NBD. This would be the coolest thing EVER! Yes, EVER! 

angryandyellow:

barackobama:

You, Bill, Barack, NBD.

This would be the coolest thing EVER!

Yes, EVER! 

May 24

Nom. Plus, everything is better if a martini glass is somehow involved. (Taken with instagram)

Nom. Plus, everything is better if a martini glass is somehow involved. (Taken with instagram)

May 21

Frequently. If had a baby, I would dress it like this so frequently. And throughout the day I would just look down at my baby and laugh, because he’s dressed like a creature from the Serengeti. 

Frequently. If had a baby, I would dress it like this so frequently. And throughout the day I would just look down at my baby and laugh, because he’s dressed like a creature from the Serengeti. 

(Source: d4vis, via boomachikaboom)

May 19

Got this today out of curiosity. The author is British. Therefore, I obviously have to read it in a British accent. And I will. (Taken with instagram)

Got this today out of curiosity. The author is British. Therefore, I obviously have to read it in a British accent. And I will. (Taken with instagram)

It seemed rude to put the heavy diaper bag right on the baby’s lap. Then I realized it was a fake baby. (Taken with instagram)

It seemed rude to put the heavy diaper bag right on the baby’s lap. Then I realized it was a fake baby. (Taken with instagram)

[video]

(Source: tastefullyoffensive, via the-absolute-funniest-posts)